33: Family

Shyba—

A perfect, untouched blanket of snow covers every inch of the scene before me. It is so surreal. It’s almost unbelievable that I have been here long enough to see such a sight. So much has happened in the past months and yet it seems like it has flown by so quickly. I have learned so many things and every day I experience something new. This place, these people continue to surprise me.

Footsteps rapidly descend the stairs, drawing my attention. Kiara rushes down, nearly tripping on the last one, making my heart leap. She corrects herself before I have a chance to run to her though and quickly comes over to stand beside me, looking out the window as she bounces on her toes. The smile on her face brings a warm feeling to my chest.

“It’s so beautiful! I’m so happy we get to have a white Christmas!” she says, her eyes lit up. “Have you ever seen this much snow? Does it snow like this in Tokyo?”

Her mention of Tokyo makes my heart ache. “Ah, sometimes. I did not see so much like this for a long time.”

She giggles. “Well, I’m glad you got to see it here. I can’t wait to play in it!”

“Play?” Does she mean like children do?

“Yeah, like make snowmen!”

Something in my chest seems to stir and I want to run outside. “I did not make snowmen before.”

She pauses. “Well, after we eat breakfast, I’ll show you how to make one, okay?”

It seems important to her, so I nod. We start preparing breakfast as everyone else begins to wake, as has become the routine. I try to do whatever I can to be of use. Sometimes it still feels as though I am a burden. However, I do the best I can. Still, I already can’t imagine my life being any different now, which is a thought that is both comforting and terrifying.

As soon as everyone finishes breakfast, we all bundle up before heading outside, me using an old coat of Jeremiah’s. The girls run out as fast as they can, jumping around and throwing snow everywhere. It is about a foot deep, so there is plenty to go around.

I slowly follow Kiara, looking around as though seeing everything for the first time. It is all so beautiful I almost feel bad walking through it. We find a spot by the garden fence near the arched entrance and as she makes a snowman, I follow her instructions. It is not difficult and yet Kiara looks to be so amused. Of course, she always seems happy, even when doing the most mundane of tasks.

Watching her, the chill bites at my cheeks, making them feel warm. Once we are finished, we stand back to examine our efforts. Mine looks nowhere near as good as hers. Suddenly, I feel something rushing toward us and push her behind me as I turn to face it. My fist reflexively snaps up and upon impact white powder flies everywhere. Jeremiah’s boisterous laugh from across the yard catches me off guard and I relax upon seeing there is no real threat.

Kiara laughs. “Oh, it’s on now! This is war!” she shouts, gathering up snow as quickly as she can.

I pause. Is this really happening? For a second, I am back on school grounds, watching the kids throw snowballs at each other out the window as I sit alone in the classroom, a tutor watching my every move. Something wells up within me. Excitement?

Before I realize, we are all throwing snow at each other, running around to find cover. The war lasts for at least half an hour, and we cover most of the front yard before calling a truce.

“That was awesome!” Jeremiah shouts, plopping down on the ground.

My eyes shift between the two of them, feeling a smile on my face as I catch my breath, shaking snow out of my hair. I never knew how much fun having a snowball fight would be. It kind of felt like sparring. A giggle draws my attention up to the porch where Reba is watching us with a smile.

She waves us in. “I made hot cocoa,” she calls.

The twins hurry in upon hearing that and the three of us follow. Once back in, the warmth from the fireplace is like a blanket. We hang our coats up and gather around the table, taking our respective cups. Somehow, I always end up with the black and white striped one. I suppose it has become an unspoken gesture that it is mine to use.

As we all warm up, they tell me different stories of past Christmas’s. Of course, I don’t have any to share. Every Christmas up until now was just another cold and bitter day for me. I glance over at the tree I helped decorate as it guards several presents beneath. Once again, my chest feels tight, staring at the multitude of different colored wrappings.

I had never bought gifts before. For weeks I agonized over what to get everyone before finally deciding. Reba said I could make something, but I have no crafting skill for anything, and I wanted it to be something they would really like. At least, I hope they like them.

The door opens and Nicky comes in, heading over to set gifts under the tree while greeting everyone. He notices me and waves, while I return with a nod. Things have seemed to slowly level out between us over the months. I’ve even gone with Jer to his apartment to play games with them several more times. It’s something I’ve come to look forward to.

As the day goes on, we watch Christmas movies and I help prepare dinner. My skills cutting vegetables and the like have improved greatly. Kiara has even taught me a few simple recipes, though the time I tried making stew I accidentally put the wrong spices in, and it tasted horrible. No one was upset even though I wasted so much food and we ordered pizza that night. I felt even worse until I realized pizza tends to be a lot cheaper here in America.

After dinner everyone gathers in the living room. Reba picks up a bag, tossing a few pieces of paper inside and shaking it. “Okay, everyone grab a slip of paper,” she says.

She goes around the room, and we all do as she instructed. I reach in, pulling out a piece with the number ‘6’ on it. She sits down next to the tree after we each get one and pulls out the last piece.

Then she smiles and turns to Jade who pulled ‘1’. “Okay, Hun, give everyone their presents.”

Jade jumps up and quickly hands out her presents. The one she hands to me is rectangular and wrapped in bright red wrapping with a green ribbon. I can’t help but wonder what it could be. Once everyone has theirs Reba gives the ‘okay’ and everyone starts tearing the wrapping off. For a second, I hesitate. Is it okay to just rip it off like this?

I follow everyone’s lead though and upon opening it I find a painting done on a canvas frame. As I continue to examine it, I realize it is of all of us in front of the house, including Hunter and the other animals. Written in scraggly hand above the scene are the words “ONE BIG HAPY FAMALY”. Then much to my surprise underneath is a haphazardly stroked kanji for “family”. Upon realizing this, I feel a smile melt onto my face. She must have worked hard to write this.

Jade turns to me, noticing my reaction. “Do you like it?”

I nod. “Yes. Thank you, Jade. I will put it on the wall in my room.”

Her eyes light up and she smiles widely. Next is Jeremiah. He gives out his gifts and we all open them. I feel rather flustered still. People actually do this every year?

I rip off the green and red striped wrapping paper, revealing beneath it a black square. It unfolds and I realize it is a wallet with several pockets and a clear flap in the middle.

“I figured you might like to have one since you didn’t seem to have anywhere to put your money,” Jeremiah says.

“Thank you,” I say and pinch the plastic part. “What is this piece for?”

“You can put a photo in it if you want,” he says.

I nod slowly, though I don’t know what photo I would want to add to it. Next up is Nicky. He hands out his presents, handing me an envelope.

“Sorry Shyba. I didn’t really know what to get you, so I just got this,” he mutters. “I know you like sweet stuff, so I hope it’s okay.”

I open the envelope and pull out a small plastic card with the words, ‘Sea Breeze Creamery Gift Card’. I recognize the name from a shop down by the boardwalk that sells ice cream. My brows pull together.

“What is a gift card?” I ask.

“Oh, it’s like money, I guess?” he mutters and adjusts his glasses. “There’s twenty dollars on it, so you can buy that much worth of ice cream with it. I mean, preferably not all at once, but uh… it’s yours to do what you want with.”

My brows rise. “It is for ice cream?” I ask and stare at it, wondering when a good time would be to use it. “Thank you.”

His eyes widen a bit. “You’re welcome.”

“Now you have something to put in your wallet,” Reba says.

I nod and place the card in one of the slots in the wallet. I suppose this is quite useful. Next up is Harmony and I am given a gift much like Jade’s. This time it is a painting of the three of us together, with me in the middle. We all have big smiles and I notice she had drawn flowers all around also. Once again, I cannot help but smile.

“My turn!” Kiara exclaims, hurrying over to grab her gifts.

She quickly hands them out and sits on the floor bouncing as though she can’t contain her excitement. Mine is wrapped in a white and blue snowflake wrapping and feels somewhat flimsy. I open it and before me is a black lump of fabric. As I pick it up it unfolds into a denim jacket with pockets.

My head snaps toward her. “You made this?” I ask. I knew she was working on something late during the nights. Usually that is when she is crafting something, but I never thought it was something for me.

She smiles. “Yup! Try it on!”

I pull it on, almost afraid to for fear I would somehow destroy it. Though it is a bit big on me I feel rather comfortable in it. Then I notice there are also pockets on the inside. She really worked hard on this. My face and chest begins to feel quite warm. This thing really works.

“You look good in it,” she says. “Do you like it? I even added a hood.”

Her words cause a flurry of emotion in me. For a moment I can’t find my voice. “Y-yes. Thank you,” I mutter.

“Okay, Shyba’s turn,” Reba says.

The anxiety swells up within me again and I go over to the tree, picking out the gifts I had prepared. I realize the meager job of wrapping I did compared to everyone else, but there is no time to fix it now. Once everyone has theirs, I sit back in my spot and continually hope that what I picked was good.

The first ones opened were none other than the twins. Much to my relief they smile upon seeing the jumbo coloring books I had picked for them. I did well, though it was not difficult.

Next is Reba as she reveals the book I found for her. She looks at the cover for a second and I catch the small sign of confusion on her face. I picked the wrong gift.

My thoughts jumble and I feel the words spill out. “You are a doctor so I thought you will like a book on the subject,” I mutter. “And it has a lot of pictures, so it looked good.”

She looks up and smiles at me. “Oh, it’s wonderful.”

Nicky snorts. As I glance over, he shuts up, looking away and holding his hand over his mouth.

“It’s a children’s book,” Jeremiah says, his voice wavering as he tries not to laugh.

I feel the heat rush to my face. “Ah, I can get a different one for you! I am sorry.”

Reba shakes her head and clutches the book to her chest. “No, I want it. Thank you, sweetie.”

Then as I hear more wrapping being torn, I look over at Nicky as he unveils his present. He lifts the game to look at it and says nothing, his face blank. I feel my heart sinking. Once again, I failed. I thought it looked fun. It is like the racing game we play occasionally, but newer.

“You do not like it?” I ask.

He looks at me before returning his eyes to the case. “Uh… I do… um…” He clears his throat. “I just don’t have the console to play this.”

It had never occurred to me that I was getting the wrong version. I am such an idiot! I should have made sure it was correct!

“It’s okay though,” he continues. “I can trade it in for the right one, so don’t worry about it. Thanks. We can play next time you come over.”

I feel myself deflating a bit and nod. At least it was not a waste. I look over to Jeremiah who is examining his gift. He also has a somewhat confused look on his face. How is it I was unable to procure proper gifts for everyone?

“I wanted to buy you beer since you like it, but since I do not have I.D., I was not allowed,” I mutter, staring at the floor. “B-but they allowed me to buy the root beer. I don’t know why. I-is it not… good?”

He laughs. “That explains it. This is great,” he says. “I’ll explain the difference later, but I love root beer anyway. Thanks.”

I nod slowly. I am sure he would have preferred something better though. Lastly, I glance over to Kiara. I know I at least got hers correct. She quickly tears open her present and as she realizes what it is her eyes widen and her mouth parts. I feel my heart do a flip.

“Is it a sewing kit?” Reba asks.

Kiara nods, clutching the pale pink and white box with flower designs. “Yes! It’s the one I was wanting too! It has so many accessories,” she says and looks at me with a puzzled gaze. “When I went to get it though, they were sold out. How did you get it?”

The room gets warmer, and I pull my hands together, recalling the times I had accompanied her to the fabric store and watched as each time she would pause to look at it then decide for whatever reason not to get it.

“It was the last one,” I mutter.

She smiles and her cheeks turn a soft pink. “Thank you so much. I love it.”

Her words cause my heart to flip once again and all I can manage is a nod. Reba stands and hands out her presents. I open mine and before me is a dark blue fleece blanket. I run my hand over it, the softness captivating. I can’t wait to wrap myself in this. As I unfold it something falls into my lap.

I notice it to be a picture frame with a photograph of all of us. I immediately recall the time we had taken it. Reba wanted a photo of everyone and insisted I be in it. As my eyes rove over the photograph, I notice how happy everyone looks. And then there’s… me. Even though I still don’t seem to recognize myself, the person before me somehow looks happy, even if just a bit.

“There is two gifts?” I ask. Maybe it was a mistake.

She smiles. “Do you like it, Shyba?”

“Yes. It is a good picture.”

“I’m glad,” she says. “Do you know why I gave you that photograph?”

Once more I glance over it, hoping to find the answer. “There is me?”

“Partly yes,” she tells me and comes over to kneel before me. “It’s because it’s our first family photo with you.”

Yet again, my heart aches. But strangely, it doesn’t necessarily hurt.

“Because it’s a family photo though, I would like for it to go with the rest of them, but you can choose wherever you like to put it,” she says and looks up at the photo frames above the fireplace.

I glance up at the mantle before standing. Where would be the best spot? I quickly find an empty location on the mid-left, placing it there.

“This is good?” I ask, turning back.

She smiles, her eyes crinkling. “Perfect.”

Once back in my spot, I stare up at it for a moment. It feels so surreal. They really do treat me like I am their family. My throat tightens and I inconspicuously wipe my eyes while everyone goes about checking out their gifts. My gaze returns to them, and I silently watch for a moment as they laugh and banter back and forth.

A smile melts onto my face. My family.